Ululation

Ululate:
1. to howl, as a dog or a wolf; hoot, as an owl.
2. to utter howling sounds, as in shrill, wordless lamentation; wail.
3. to lament (or celebrate) loudly and shrilly.

The word ululate is new to me. The sound, however, is not. Arabic women are famous for this 'tongue trilling' cry that, if done properly, can friggin' shatter glass. I've heard it a few times over here, mostly on the TV news. Although, one of my male colleagues got really excited one day and let one rip right in class. Bridget also attended an Arabic wedding ceremony last weekend and she said that ladies were ululating into the microphone. She also said that one of her co-teachers sometimes ululates when a student gives a wrong answer in class. Awesome.

ULULULULULULULULULLULULULULUUULULU!!!!!

Parakeets

Arriving at school last week, still half asleep from the painfully long commute out to the desert, I was awakened by a harsh metalllic squawk coming from the trees/rubbish pile in front of the school. Turns out UAE has a sizable population of Rose-ringed Parakeets. These beauties are native to India, but have suprisingly established non-migrating feral populations all over the world (USA, Europe, Middle East). A most welcome sight in the scorched earth drabness of the desert.

Pongin'

Since the kids are now gone and we have 5 weeks to kill before vacation offically begins.....the boys and me built us a sweet pong table. Two small desks, a sheet of plywood and five stacks of vocabulary flashcards = hours of fun. Only 17 days to go before we head home for summer. Yeeeeee Haaaaaawwww! I wanna celebrate Canada's natural beauty by camping my ass off this summer.

Cleansin'

Bridget has chosen an alternative way to count down the days to summer vacation freedom. She is undergoing a 'detoxifying cleanse' which involves choking down clay-based slurries of Hydrated Bentonite, sipping Alkalizer cocktails and popping cocoon-sized herbal capsules called Chompers. The pamphlet attests that the cleanse will be highly effective in voiding the body of harmful 'mucoid plaque.'

It announces that said 'mucoid plaque' is often "shiny or smooth, some pieces may look like rope..." In addition "sections of plaque as large as 2-4 feet long or more are not entirely uncommon, however most cleansers can expect plaque to come out in sections on average of 6-18 inches or longer." Stayed tuned for photos.

Schooool's Out for Summer! (almost)

The last day of school was June 23rd. The kids stopped coming around June 10th. We have to stick around until July 14th. That means we've been killin' some serious time at work. Man, I can't wait to get back to Canada. I can't wait to see trees and smell lakes and make bonfires. Also, we signed on for another year, so B and I will be back in the desert in September. What can I say. It ain't pretty out here, but it's a living......for now.

5 points if you can tell me who/what is on Wooderson's t-shirt.

The Nuge!

Answer: It's Ted Nugent morphing into an animal of some sort (Nuge loves the outdoors). It's taken from the cover of the Amboy Dukes LP - Tooth, Fang & Claw circa 74'. Wicked.

ps - Ted Nugent & the Amboy Dukes played at my high school in the early seventies.

Readin'

The countdown to vacation is ON. Been killin' time lately by reading some classics. This is my new favourite book of all time. The eccentricities of protaganist Ignatius J. Reilly made me chortle (and nearly shart) out loud. Oh why John Kennedy Toole did you take the fatal exhaust pipe bong hit at such a young age!

Side note: I once sharted whilst inside a hipster bar in Windsor, Ontario. We were discussing the brilliant subtleties of Sigor Ros and all of a sudden I 'touched cloth.' Naturally, I finished my pint, slipped out the door and into a new pair of underoos.

Golfin'

Tucked in behind our hotel/home is the illustrious Al Dhafra Golf Club. This beautifully laid out 9-hole course is a must play for any golf enthusiast. A sand-wedge is recommended.

The storied 9th green. A huge target of tamped Arabian sand, it is even sprayed (for your convenience) with some sort of oily chemical substance to keep it compact. All you need to do is sweep away your foot prints (with the complimentary broom) when you finish.

The first tee, a tricky camel-leg left. Eat your heart out Augusta National.

The 9th fairway.

The Clubhouse. This is my favourite place to hang out in the entire UAE (serious). The bartender is a super nice kid from Sri Lanka and tall cans of Murphy's Irish stout are only 25 Dirhams. I'll take ten.

Excess in the Desert - part II

A few decades ago the UAE won the natural resources lottery. Since then, ostentatious construction has been spreading faster than the sweat rings in my pits. Recently B and me visited the Grand Mosque in Abu Dhabi. It is a sprawling house of worship built of gleaming white marble and inside is the world's largest persian rug. It is really beautiful.

Bridget, like all lady visitors to the mosque, had to wear an abaya over her clothes. I think the heat was getting to her a bit in this pic.

Side note: When Bridget was getting her abaya from the lady at the mosque entrance, she quipped how it was going to be hot under all those layers. The abaya lady retorted something to the effect "You will be hot for one hour, I must be hot every day!" Oh snap!

Inside the mosque was cooled by a turbo-powered yet silent air con system, which turned Bridget back into her old happy self.

Gleaming. White. Marble.


We also visited the Burj Khalifa Tower in Dubai a few weeks back. Now the world's tallest building at 828 meters. UAE! UAE! UAE!

A model of the Burj.

Excess in the Desert

There is a huuuuge aquarium and mini-zoo inside the Dubai mall. It is really clean and well maintained. Makes the (Korean) Jungmun Beach aquarium look like a gulag.

I forgot how awesome penguins are. This is a Magellanic penguin. He was named after Ferdinand Magellan because he 'discovered' them in coastal Argentina/Chile/Falkland islands. Later Magellan was killed by a warrior's arrow on a beach in the Phillipines. Explorin' ain't easy.